A typical morning with Lukas

6:00am -: Daddy pays Lukas a visit; often met with cranky 'why did you wake me/I'm hungry and wet' crying. Daddy entertains Lukas with silly faces and strangely coherent gibberish. Lukas gets a fresh new dipe and some gourmet warmed formula, cut with some custom-made breastmilk...mmmmm-mmmm good!

7:30am - Mommy wakes up in a groggy panic. Hurries to pump/read/eat breakfast, all at the same time. Sometimes a shower occurs, when mommy gets lucky. No time for styling, though...Lukas doesn't seem to mind the 'wild woman from the forest' look, anyway.

8:30am - Lukas wakes up with a few little cries. Mommy goes in the room, and is met with the most delicious, sweet smiles. Loving glances and sweet nothings are exchanged, while Lukas gets released from his swaddle and stretches for the day. Giggles continue with a diaper change, which is usually accompanied by mommy's vocal rendition of the theme song from "Flashdance". Lukas accompanies the song with the naked version of the dance - legs kicking in a quick running-motion. Occasional urine shower is inevitable. Much laughing from Lukas.

9:00am - Tummy time. Dreaded tummy time. This only goes over well if Lukas is in the perfect mood for it, which is rare. On this morning, he seems to be tolerating it quite well. Lukas gives mommy a calm, serene stare...and spits up copiously on the bed. Curses! Mommy, when will you ever leearn to anticipate these bodily functions? Sigh...

9:15am -Mommy leaves Lukas on her bed, to fetch morning bottle. Comes back to find Lukas on his side...he's going to roll over! Amazed, mommy tip-toes into the room. Wait...what is Lukas waiting for? Something has caught his attention....the television set. Live with Regis and Kelly. He's watching Regis. Mommy's going to have to have a talk with Lukas about his television addiction.

10:00am - After a feeding and more giggles, Lukas comes downstairs for his daily meeting with his friends, the hanging birdies mobile. Much cooing ensues, as the daily news is discussed amongst them. Mommy rushes to clean the kitchen, sterilize bottles, prepare formula, and get that cursed Lactaid ready.

10:18am - Lukas always takes a nap a few hours after waking up. Mommy picks Lukas up, and in a tender moment, reflects on how amazing the baby is, and how lucky she is to be a mom. Mommy proceeds to dance with Lukas in the living room...Lukas tolerates it for a minute, and then bursts into annoyed cries. Oops. Mommy swaddles Lukas for his nap, but Lukas cries more. Apparently he's not ready for his nap yet. Mommy unswaddles Lukas, and returns him to his bouncy chair.

10:20am - Lukas starts crying. WHY AM I NOT SWADDLED FOR MY NAP????? Mommy hops to it. Lukas takes his nap. Mommy makes her coffee (which she recently began drinking again) and types furiously to add a clever entry to her blog. Catches up on email and checks schedule for the day (yes, mommy is just as busy as always). Tries to plan the afternoon, knowing it's a joke to attempt such structure.

11:00am - Lukas wakes up, refreshed. Mommy downs her coffee, stops her playtime on the computer, and picks up Lukas. She knows he's been busy working on a special project for her. A project in his diaper.

Afternoon approaches. Don't even think about getting a play-by-play of the afternoon. It's really just a game of improvisation, but much like a soap opera: lots of drama and cliffhangers.

Tag team (aka the conspiracy against mommy)

I think Matiss and Lukas have come to some kind of agreement regarding parental responsibilities. As Lukas' primary caregiver, I find that I have the privilege of changing the vast majority of his poopy diapers. I used to think that Matiss had nothing to do with this - after all, he works all day, and he can't help that Lukas has his daily constitutional like clockwork, in the late morning. So on the weekends, I carefully listen for the explosion and pass off to Daddy, only to find that the sound was nothing but the wind....literally. I can't catch a break.

Last night I realized that something sinister was afoot. Matiss, being the wonderful man that he is, takes charge of putting Lukas down every night. This entails getting the formula ready, giving the bedtime feeding, and preparing the overnight diaper. Last night, however, Matiss was more tired and drained than usual, so I did what any devoted, loving wife would do, and sent him to bed early. I got everything ready, and when I went to put him in his overnight diaper....I discovered a stinky surprise attack. It's the ONLY time he's ever done his business before bed. Then he decided that it was party time, and started kicking up a storm while I scrambled to recover from the ambush. I dragged my tired behind to bed much later than usual, after much cleaning of various body parts and baby essentials.

Oh, and for good measure, last night he decided that sleeping through the night was coming to an end. I guess the more mommy he gets, the more mommy he wants. Now, if I could just figure out what Matiss is paying him...